My life as a HIDER is finally over. People hide for many reasons and at different stages in life. My hiding had more to do with me not expressing my true feelings and ideas to people. One of the ways I overcame hiding was knowing I had something valuable to contribute to society and I wanted to contribute.
My hiding started to decrease as I began to be around more people that shared the same thoughts and ideas on life as I did. I was starting to feel more open to be who I really am. These associations encouraged me to embrace the things I love. Other ways to show up in your life is to join your local meetup group of your interest. This will encourage you to participate in something you like and meet like minded people. Which will make it easier for you to communicate your thoughts, hobbies, ideas and etc. Now I must tell you this effort still takes willpower to do these things but you can do it. I was hiding in what appeared to be a very small thing but it just grew. I was so comfortable with hiding in the lie to cover up my true self. I believe it began when I was a little girl. My name is Sulesa and years ago when I was growing up this name looked foreign to everybody that saw my name. Even teachers had a very hard time with my name. So to keep everyone from stumbling over my name I just would say call me Lisa ( I wanted people to be comfortable). Now can you believe a lot of people can pronounce it correctly with no problem. I have embraced my real name and now everyone I meet I introduce myself as Sulesa. Most people comment and say that is a Beautiful name. Now there is more people with unusual names in these times we are living in. Times do change and so does social norms. The things I loved over thirty years ago was not popular in my circle as a matter of fact some may have even thought you to be weird for liking those things. I loved and still love aromatherapy, journaling, herbs, flowers(healing purposes) meditation, juicing and etc. Now of course my pure love and devotion to God was always there in my heart. I loved anything that I felt would assist me on my journey called life. Now I did not love these things over God because I knew God put these things on my path to experience and enjoy. God was and still is my source. A Lot of times I even felt divinely guided to people, books, workshops and etc. that I discovered. So because these things were not popular and I did not want to be judged and put in a box I hid these wonderful tools that assisted me in life. (Again, I did not want people to be uncomfortable with me-so I hid my love and knowledge) Which could have helped a lot of people back then and even now. I enjoyed them but not to the fullest-because I like to help people and I was not helping people like I could have if I was not hiding it. It looks silly today that I hid because more people know and have heard about them(Also I too concerned about how people felt or how I thought they were going to feel). I see people embracing these things now that I was afraid to 30 years ago. Even well-known hospitals like the Cleveland Clinic and University Hospitals are embracing aromatherapy and scientist are seeing that mediation is actually good for lowering blood pressure and stress. Some in the religious community are now saying that God is within us. Something I felt along time ago and enjoyed and still enjoy that relationship today. Times change and so do social norms. Through all of this I learned some valuable lessons and this hiding has cost me some years of my life because I was concerned about what others would think of me. I can truly appreciate Terry Cole-Whittaker’s book “WHAT YOU THINK OF ME IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS”. Now I know to fully embrace this life no matter what and it takes a lot of willpower to break old habits of hiding so I have gotten over most of it but I do know it is a journey. I am ready for this journey and I am inviting anyone else that want to come along and join me to get rid of hiding and let’s start living. Let’s Show up for Life together!!! |
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